So I was thinking about nightmares...not because I had one in which a midget clown was chasing me with two syringes of AIDS blood....but because it goes to show just how crazy we are.
Nightmares are scary movies our brains make for us. I am not a fan of scary movies. I can handle slasher flicks but supernatural shit is a big no no. I guess I was born in that day an age when the Exorcist came out and people believe if you saw the movie the devil would be sitting next to you. I have too much of an over active imagination to watch those movies. So I was watching 'Paranormal Investigations' on Syfy because I apparently felt that I don't like to sleep. This particular show was about a haunted music box. I watched this damn show at 2pm. That night I heard every damn creak and crack of the house. Why is water leaking out of the faucet? Does that mean Satan is coming for me?
What is extremely dumb about being afraid is the stupid things to calm ourselves. I'll sleep with the light on...as if a GE Soft white 60-watt light bulb somehow manages to keep back the Prince of Darkness...what does he do at a Ozzy concert with all that pyrotechnics and flashing lights? Yes I have this irrational fear that the devil is coming for me. But it's not just Satan.
Growing up in the 70's and 80's my saturday morning was full of cartoons. We didn't have any fan dangled Cartoon Network and cartoons didn't come on all the time. My Saturday schedule was cartoons, Soul Train at 11am and then Creature Double Feature. Creature Double Feature scarred my brother Dana and I badly. Dana didn't eat jelly for a week (our childhood lunch staple) because it was too much like the Blob. The movie that fucked me up was Tarantula. In the movie a scientist is working on growth hormones to increase food and so naturally he would inject his chemicals into nature's Charles Manson. Like why would you do that? Spiders alone are scary enough...making one big enough to get a zip code is the high level of stupidity. From this movie grew my fear of spiders. So on top of my fear of the devil I am also in fear of giant spiders. Like, no joke, when I enter a dark room and turn the lights on I look at the ceiling because that's where spiders live. The minute someone makes a movie about a satanic possessed giant spider I am fucked.
*Devil Spider now on SyFy*
Dammit.
Friday, January 17, 2014
Thursday, January 16, 2014
Random thoughts on Food
So it's been a while since I have written here. Longer still on the Shit My Landlady says blog. I think someone tipped her to the blog and she keeps herself locked away from me and asks me for advice before she does things. So I am back and decided to blog about a discussion I had this morning...
Food.
Ok I love food...and before you judge me and make snide remarks "of course we know you like food we've seen that belly." I say to you "Shut the fuck up. I don't need the negativity in my life. I am working on it." Anyhow I love food. "What did I just say?" I love food but I am confused at how we got to some of the foods that we eat. What was we thinking when we created these foods. Fruit, I get fruit. You see this apple hanging on the tree, you grab it and bite it and it's delicious. That's an easy get for me.
What I don't get is how ancient man looked at a cow and thought..."I want to eat that." I am not a farm boy but I have been around cows. They stink. They are covered in flies. Nothing about the animal makes me think "Someone get me some onions because I am about to grill this shit out of this bitch." If you think about the process for meat that sounds like something a crazy person would come up with. Imagine if there was no meat in the world and you come over to my house and I am serving steak. "Mmm this is delicious. What is it?" You'd say. "See that cow in my backyard. There was another just like it. I got it fat and then killed it. I drained it's blood and cut it into pieces. I took those pieces and burned them and served them. Enjoy." You would be out of my house so fast and calling the cops. "He's doing weird things to animals."
"Mmm this stuff on my salad is awesome." "It is the flesh of a dead pig that I cut into ribbons and cooked and served to you."
The only thing I can think of is someone was high. Someone was on that shit and looked at a pig and said "Why Not?"
Think about it. There were probably two guys sitting in a meadow, smoking that "OwwwWeee" and got the munchies.
*Pufff-cough*
"Hey man pass me an apple." One said to the other.
"Aww shit man I forgot the apples." The other replied.
"Man I am soo hungry...I'm about to eat the next thing I see"
*Cow walks into the meadow*
You all are gonna be vegetarians for a week thinking about it.
That being said I think we need to take some of these scientists off the next flavor of Doritos Locos tacos and put them on curing some diseases. We have cheese cooked into the pizza crust but we can't knock out the cough...or a sneeze. It will be the year 3014 and we'll have nacho cheese Doritos lap tops and we'll still need to get flu shots.
These are just my thoughts.
Food.
Ok I love food...and before you judge me and make snide remarks "of course we know you like food we've seen that belly." I say to you "Shut the fuck up. I don't need the negativity in my life. I am working on it." Anyhow I love food. "What did I just say?" I love food but I am confused at how we got to some of the foods that we eat. What was we thinking when we created these foods. Fruit, I get fruit. You see this apple hanging on the tree, you grab it and bite it and it's delicious. That's an easy get for me.
What I don't get is how ancient man looked at a cow and thought..."I want to eat that." I am not a farm boy but I have been around cows. They stink. They are covered in flies. Nothing about the animal makes me think "Someone get me some onions because I am about to grill this shit out of this bitch." If you think about the process for meat that sounds like something a crazy person would come up with. Imagine if there was no meat in the world and you come over to my house and I am serving steak. "Mmm this is delicious. What is it?" You'd say. "See that cow in my backyard. There was another just like it. I got it fat and then killed it. I drained it's blood and cut it into pieces. I took those pieces and burned them and served them. Enjoy." You would be out of my house so fast and calling the cops. "He's doing weird things to animals."
"Mmm this stuff on my salad is awesome." "It is the flesh of a dead pig that I cut into ribbons and cooked and served to you."
The only thing I can think of is someone was high. Someone was on that shit and looked at a pig and said "Why Not?"
Think about it. There were probably two guys sitting in a meadow, smoking that "OwwwWeee" and got the munchies.
*Pufff-cough*
"Hey man pass me an apple." One said to the other.
"Aww shit man I forgot the apples." The other replied.
"Man I am soo hungry...I'm about to eat the next thing I see"
*Cow walks into the meadow*
You all are gonna be vegetarians for a week thinking about it.
That being said I think we need to take some of these scientists off the next flavor of Doritos Locos tacos and put them on curing some diseases. We have cheese cooked into the pizza crust but we can't knock out the cough...or a sneeze. It will be the year 3014 and we'll have nacho cheese Doritos lap tops and we'll still need to get flu shots.
These are just my thoughts.
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
Year In Review or Damn that was quick...
I have never thought to do these look backs at my life. I tend to live fast and furious. I seldom look back at the past and perhaps that not a good way to do things but it is what it is. This has been a banner year for 'the kid'.
This year I added a Master's Degree in Creative Writing to my Bachelor's in Film. I wrote a pretty kick ass thesis script called "Teddy Knight". I co-wrote a script with my writing partner, Paris Lay, called "He/She"...yeah we are gonna change the name. I wrote "Penance" a story about a father dealing with a son who massacred a bunch of people in gun violence. I originally wrote it as a web series and I am currently converting it into a hour long episode to sell to the networks. I started an experiment and tried to write two scripts at the same time. "Machina" tells the story of a female robot that comes to Earth and defends us from an invasion. I wrote it because I felt there should be a role model for my daughter and there are few female 'superheroes' out there. I am also writing "Brother" which tells the story of two slave brothers in pre-civil war America separated by slavery and the obstacles they go through to reunite. I will finish them soon and return to writing one script at a time. I started writing for RobotUnderdog.com which combined the two things I love...geek stuff and movies. Several more opportunities have opened up for me and I cannot wait to see what 2014 has in store for my career.
In 2013 I learned the importance of family...and not just family but extended family. It started with the death of my Uncle Manny. I returned home to Rhode Island after almost 20 years. Even in death he is still teaching me things. I was reunited with my family of cousins, aunts and uncles. The point was hammered home when visiting my grandmother and seeing a picture of my daughter Maia hanging on her refrigerator. I was reunited with my father and his family...and saw the baby pics of me he still keeps.
My family got a little bigger when my brother married the love of his life. It was an awesome ceremony made even more awesome by the inclusion of me...lol. On top of the wedding and news that they are expecting a little girl...it saw the reunion go the Black Bat Boys: Dana, Myself and Wally...what a difference a few years makes.
Last night I welcomed in the new year from a building over looking Los Angeles. There was a sense of wonder and excitement that was missing in my life. 2013 was the foundation. 2014 will be the year that I begin the transition from crawling to walking.
This year I added a Master's Degree in Creative Writing to my Bachelor's in Film. I wrote a pretty kick ass thesis script called "Teddy Knight". I co-wrote a script with my writing partner, Paris Lay, called "He/She"...yeah we are gonna change the name. I wrote "Penance" a story about a father dealing with a son who massacred a bunch of people in gun violence. I originally wrote it as a web series and I am currently converting it into a hour long episode to sell to the networks. I started an experiment and tried to write two scripts at the same time. "Machina" tells the story of a female robot that comes to Earth and defends us from an invasion. I wrote it because I felt there should be a role model for my daughter and there are few female 'superheroes' out there. I am also writing "Brother" which tells the story of two slave brothers in pre-civil war America separated by slavery and the obstacles they go through to reunite. I will finish them soon and return to writing one script at a time. I started writing for RobotUnderdog.com which combined the two things I love...geek stuff and movies. Several more opportunities have opened up for me and I cannot wait to see what 2014 has in store for my career.
In 2013 I learned the importance of family...and not just family but extended family. It started with the death of my Uncle Manny. I returned home to Rhode Island after almost 20 years. Even in death he is still teaching me things. I was reunited with my family of cousins, aunts and uncles. The point was hammered home when visiting my grandmother and seeing a picture of my daughter Maia hanging on her refrigerator. I was reunited with my father and his family...and saw the baby pics of me he still keeps.
My family got a little bigger when my brother married the love of his life. It was an awesome ceremony made even more awesome by the inclusion of me...lol. On top of the wedding and news that they are expecting a little girl...it saw the reunion go the Black Bat Boys: Dana, Myself and Wally...what a difference a few years makes.
Last night I welcomed in the new year from a building over looking Los Angeles. There was a sense of wonder and excitement that was missing in my life. 2013 was the foundation. 2014 will be the year that I begin the transition from crawling to walking.
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